Showing posts with label Funny Shayari. Show all posts

Funny Shayari in Hindi - Funny Status - Comedy Shayari | अध्याय 2

September 14, 2022


Yeh Exam Ke Rishte Bhi Ajeeb Hote Hain,
Sab Apne Apne Naseeb Hote Hain,
Rahte Hain Jo Nigahon Se Door,
Saale Wahi Question Compulsory Hote Hain.


Aankho se aansuo ki judai kar do,
Dil se ghamo ki vidaai kar do,
Agar dil na lage kahin to,
Aa jao mere ghar ki SAFAi kar do..


Hum dua karte hain Khuda se,
ki wo aap jaisa dost aur na banaye,

Ek Cartoon jaisi cheez hai humare paas,
kahin wo bhi common na ho jaye!


Dekha tujhe to rooh khush ho gayi,
Ek kami thi woh bhi puri ho gayi,

Pagal hain woh log jo kehte hain ki,
Chimpanzee ki aakhri nasal kahin kho gayi!


Student Shayari:
Aasma mein kaali ghata chai hai,
Aaj fir principal se maar khai hai,
Sab kehte hai sudhar ja,
Kya kare aaj madam fir sheela ban ke aayi hai.


Tere chehre pe udasi aankhon mein nami hai,
Tere chehre pe udasi aankhon mein nami hai,

TATA namak istemal karo
Kyun ki IODINE ki kami hai.


Wo Jo Sar Jhuka Ke Baithe Hain,
Hamara Dil Churaye Baithe Hain,
Humne Unse Kaha Hamara Dil Hume Lauta Do,
To Bole Hum To Hatho Mein Mehndi Laga Ke Baithe Hain.


Charon Taraf Hai Faili Moonlite,
Machhar Bhi Dene Ko Betaab Hai Aapko Luvbite,
Takiye Ko Gale Laga Ke Sone Ka Tight,
Bole to Wo Sweet Dreams Wala 
...
Good Night


Arz Kiya Hai:
Petrol dalo to gari chalti hai,
Wah Wah

Petrol dalo to gari chalti hai,
Bhai Wah Wah

Petrol dalo to gari chalti hai,
Zara si tawajja plz

Bhai petrol dalo to gari chalti hai,
Kya irshad farmaya hai,

Petrol dalo to gari chalti hai

Nahi dalo to nahi chalti hai.


Log Ishq Karte Hain,
Bade Shor Ke Saath,

Hamne Bhi Kiya,
Bade Jor Ke Saath,

Magar Ab Karenge Thoda,
Gour Ke Saath,

Kyonki Kal Usko Dekha,
Kisi Aur Ke Saath.


Ladki Sath Ho To Restaurant Ka Bill,
Ladki Door Ho To Mobile Ka Bill,
Aur Ladki Hamesha Ke Liye Hi Door Ho Jaye To,
Daru Ka Bill,
Isliye Na Lagana Dil,
Na Aayega Bill.


Har khwab hamesha sachcha nahi hota,
bahut zyada pyaar bhi acha nahi hota,
kisi ko kum na samajhna is duniya mein dost,
kyu ki har dudh peene wala bachcha nahi hota.


Chicken aise pakao ke kaccha na ho..
Wah wah

Chicken aise pakao k kaccha na ho..
Aur

Mohabbat aise nibhao k baccha na ho!


Message Pe Message Bhejte Ho,
Bhej Bhej Ke Bheja Kharab Karte Ho,
Bhejte Ho To Bhi Kya Bhejte Ho,
Khud Ka Bheja To Chalta Nahi,
Doosron Ka Bheja Hua Bhejte Ho.


Machhar Ne Jo Kata,
Dil Mein Mere Junoon Tha,

Khujali Itni Huyi Ke,
Dil Be sukun Tha,

Pakda Toh Chhod Diya,
Yeh Sochkar,

Saale Ki Rago Mein,
Apna Hi Khoon Tha.


Ishq Ne Ghalib, Nikamma Kar Diya,
Varna Hum Bhi, Aadmi The Kaam Ke.


Salam Arz Hai,
Jawab Karz Hai,
Dena Farz Hai,
Na Dena Marz Hai,
Na Koi Garz Hai,
Bas Itna Arz Hai,
Agar SMS Padhna Pasand Hai,
To BHEJNA Bhi Farz Hai…!


कौन ‘कमबख्त’ कहता है,
लड़के सोचते कम हैं
..
लड़की एक बार मुस्करा कर तो देखे
शेरवानी के रंग से लेकर बच्चों तक के नाम सोच लेते
हैं।


Hume tumse Love hai..
Please refuse na karna..

Ye zero watt ka hope bulb hai..
Please ise fuse na karna!


Itna khubsurat kaise muskura lete ho,
Itna qatil kaise sharma lete ho,

Kitni aasani se jaan le lete ho,
Kisi ne sikhaya hai..
ya bachpan se hi kamine ho? 


Tum Kya Chale Gaye,
Baag Se Titliya Chali Gayi

Phool Murjha Gaye
Patte Jal Kar Raakh Hue.
Ab Aur Mat Satao
Garden Mein Paani Dena Hai
Kaam Par Jaldi Aao.


Tumse mil kar ho gaya zindagi se pyar,
Ab humein chhod kar mat jana yaar,

Bin tere hum jee na paayenge,
Tum na hote to hum ULLU kaise banayenge.


Hamne tumse pyar kiya abla samajh kar,
Tere baap ne mujhe peeta tabla samajh kar,
Maine tumse pyar kiya durga samajh kar,
Tere bhaiyo ne mujhe kaata murga samajh kar.


Barish Ka Mousam Bahut Tadpata Hai,
Unki Yaad Aati Hai Jinhe Dil Chahta Hai,
Lekin Wo Aaye Bhi To Kaise,
Na Unke Paas Raincoat Hai Aur Na Chahta Hai.


Zindagi ki bhaag daud raste badal jate hai,
Tez hawa mein sahil ke kinare badal jate hai,
Aksar sochta hu padh-2 ke sa record tod du,
Par kitaab kholte hi irade badal jate hain.


Pucha mujh se chand sitaro ne,
Tujhe bhula diya tere jigri yaaro ne,
Maine muskurate huye kaha,
Bhul to nahi sakte kamine,
Bas lage honge kisi ko patane mein.


Sheetal Sheetal vayu Chali,
Aasman Hua Suhana,

Gadhe Bhi sms Padhne Lage,
Shikshit Hua jamana.
Happy Winter Time.


Zindagi lambi hai dost banate raho,
Dil mile na mile haath milate raho,
Taj Mahal banana toh bahut costly hoga,
Par har gali mai ek Mumtaz banate raho


Ankhon se barsaat hoti hain,
Jab apki yaad saath hoti hai,
Jab b busy rahe mera cell to ..
Samajh lena aapki hone wali ..
Bhabhi se meri baat hoti hain.


Pyar ki gadi mein kabhi petrol nahi hota,
pyar ke safar mein kabhi panchar nahi hota,
Pyar jivan ki aisi gadi hai jis mein…

Do se jyada passenger hona achha nahi hota.


Arz kiya he
Tere pyar ke saaye ne mujhe aisa pyasa banaya,
.wah wah.Tere pyar ke saaye ne mujhe aisa pyasa banaya,
.wah wah.Tu 2 min ruk..
mein pani pi ke aaya.


Miss Karte Hai Aapko,
Yaad Bhi Bahut Satati Hai,

Karne Ko To Phone,
Bhi Kar Lete Par,

Customer Care Ki Ek Ladki,
Balance Kam Batati Hai.


Usne jo sher mara to wah wah ho gayi..
Usne jo sher mara to wah wah ho gayi..
Aur Maine jo Sher mara toh..
Toh toh

Sherni widwa ho gayi..!


Teri dosti mein deewane ho gaye,
Tujhe apna banate-banate khud se begane ho gaye,
Pukar le pyar se ek baar mere dost,
Murge ki aawaz sun ke zamane ho gaye.


Main Hoon Jis Haal Mein
Ae Mere Sanam Rehne De
Chaaku Mat De Mere Haathon Mein

Kalam Rehne De

Main To Shayar Hoon

Mera Dil Hai Bahut Hi Nazook
Main Patakhe Hi Se Mar 
Jaunga
Bomb Rehne De.


Jab tum is duniya se jaoge,
Door kahin ek naya janam paoge,
Is baar jo hua bahut bura hua,
Agli baar tum ek lambi pooch aur chaar taang paoge.


Yaad karte hai tumhe tanhai mein,
Dil duba hai gamo ki gahrai mein,

Hume mat dhundo duniya ki bheed mein,
Hum milenge tumhe fir kisi,
...
Free SMS ki scheme mein.


Ajab si halat hai tere jane ke bad,
Mujhe bhukh lagti nahi khana khane ke baad,
Mere pass do hi samose the jo maine kha liye,
Ek tere aane se pehle ek tere jane ke baad.


Zor se chali hawa udd gaye aap,
wah wah..
zor se chali hawa udd gaye aap,
phir..
phir kya
...
Ruk gayi hawa aur gir gaye aap.


Lamha Lamha karke waqt guzar jayega,
7 fero ka sathi tumse bandh diya jayega,

Abhi bhi waqt hai yaaro kisi ko pata lo,
Kya pata kal kisi ka pataya hua maal..
Tumhein saup diya jayega.


तेरी दुनिया में कोई गम ना हो,
तेरी खुशियाँ कभी कम न हो,

भगवान तुझे ऐसी आइटम दे,
जो अग्निपथ की चिकनी चमेली से कम ना हो !


Arz kiya he:

Dil Logi ya jaan logi !
.wah wah.


Dil Logi ya jaan logi !
.wah wah.


Meri jaan set hone me kitna time logi 


Barish ho aur zameen gilli na ho,
Dhoop nikli aur sarso peeli na ho,

To phir aap ne yeh kaise soch liya ke,
Neend me aap ki yaad aaye aur salwar gilli na ho.


Julfo Me Phoolon Ko Saja Ke Aayi Hai,
Chehare Se Dupatta Utha Ke Aayi Hai,
Kisi Ne Puchha Aaj Badi Khubsurat Lag Rahi Ho,
Mane Kaha Shayad Aaj Naha Ke Aayi Hai.


Yeh Kaisa Tera Pyar Hai Zaalim,
Dil Na Raha,

Sarkari Daftar Ban Gaya Hai,
Na Koi Kam Karta Hai,

Aur Na Hi,
Kisi Ki Baat Sunta Hai.


Ishq ki dukan hai meri,
Ishq le jaya karo,
Hum lete nahi paise Ishq k badle ..
Bus ek kiss de jaya karo.


Yaad Aane Lage Chacha Ghalib Ya Elahi!
Ye Majra Kya Hai?

Takata Hoon Harek Ladki Ko

Varna In Aankhon Ka Fayda Kya Hai

Kapdo Ki Aabo Taab Dikhane Mein Reh Gya

Kuch Khoobsurat Ko Lubhane Mein Reh Gya

Murge Ki Taang Kha Gye Shadi Mein Saare Log

Main Deston Se Hath Milane Mein Reh Gya.


Agar Doodh Mein Gire Chawal Use Khir Kehte Hain,
Agar Doodh Mein Gire Chawal Use Khir Kehte Hain,
Agar Pyar Mein Pade Jutey Use Taqdeer Kehte Hain.


Arz Kiya Hai
Saari Raat Guzar Jaati Hai
Bas Isi Kasmakash Mein Ki..
..
Yeh Saali Razai Mein
Hawa Kidhar Se Ghus Rahi
Hai..!


Popcorn ki khushbu,
Mungfali ki bahaar,

Thandi ka mausam aa gaya hai yaar,

Thodi si masti,
Thoda sa pyar,

Muffler sweater rakho dhokar taiyaar.
Happy Winter season


Mausam Ne Li Angrai,
Aur Humne Orhi Razai,

Ice-Cream se Hui Larrai,
Moongphali Ghar Main Aai,

Cold Drink se Muh Mod Liya,

Coffee Se Nata Jod Liya.
Happy Winter Season


Aapki yaad mein humne nai kalam uthai,
Liya paper aur tasveer aapki banai,

Socha tha ki usko sambhal kar rakhenge,
Magar wo to baccchon ko darane ke kaam aayee.


Kisi shayar ne kaha..
Zindagi ek lamba safar hai,

Kisi aashiq ne kaha..
Zindagi ek mushkil paheli hai,

Are dosto zindagi ka arth toh sirf voh bata sakta hai,
Jiski shaadi ke baad bhi koi saheli hai!


Khuda kare kisi ko mohabbat me judai na mile,
Kabhi bhi kisi ko ishq mein bewafayi na mile,
Aur jo meri es post ko padh kar bhi Like na kare,
Usko thand mein kabhi rajayi naa mile.


Pani Aane Ki Baat Karte Ho,
Dil Jalane Ki Baat Karte Ho,
Char Din Se Muh Nahi Dhoya,
Tum Nahane Ki Baat Karte Ho.


Ha HaHa Ha HaHa Ha Ha Ha
Ha Ha Ha Ha HaHa Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha
Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha
Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha HaHa Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha
Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha HaHa Ha Ha
Ha Ha

Kuch Nahi Aise Hi Teri Sakal Yaad Aa Gayi Thi.


India is Nation and Dadar is Station,
Wah Wah

India is Nation and & Dadar is Station,
Do Not Fall in Love,
First Complete Your Education..!


Dhokha milta hai jab pyar mein,
Zindagi mein udasi chha jati hai,

Sochte hain chhor denge is duniya ko,
Kambakht college me dusri pasand aa jati hai.


Aaj Tum Pe Aansuo Ki Barsat Hogi,
Phir Wahi Kadkti Kali Raat Hogi,
SMS Na Kar Ke Tune Dil Dukhaya Hai Mera,
Ja Tere Badan Mein Khujli Sari Raat Hogi.


Aahat Si Koi Aaye To Lagta Hai Ki Tum Ho,
Saya Sa Koi Lehraye To Lagta Hai Ki Tum Ho,
Ab Tumhi Batao Tum Kaya Kisi Bhoot Se Kum Ho.


Jab tum aaine ke paas jaate ho?
To aainaa kehta hai?

Beautiful..
Beautiful..

Aur jab aaine se door jaate ho?
To aainaa kehta hai?

April fool..
April fool..


Kaun Sa Gham Hai Jo Yeh Haal Bana Rakha Hai,
Na Toh Makeup Hai,
Na Baalon Ko Saja Rakha Hai,

Khamkha Chhedti Rahti Hai Yeh Rukhsaron Ko,
Tumne Julfon Ko Bahut Sar Pe Chada Rakha Hai.


Sms Bhejne Ka Nahi Tha Shok Hamein,
Teri Yaad Ne Mobile Pakda Diya,

Message Likhte Likhte Space Khatam Huyi,
Humne Overwrite Allowed Chala Diya,

Mere Yaar Sms Ka Reply Dena,
Hamne Apna Farz Nibha Diya.


Ice Cream Tu Bahut Nirali,
Thandi Mithi Swad Mein Aali,


Dekh Tujhe Man Lalchaya Hai,
Muh Mein Pani Aa Jata Hai,


Jeebh Turant Bahar Aa Jaaye,
Bin Khaye Fir Rah Na Paayein ,


Kon Charon Aur Ghumati,
Chaat Chaat Kar Khoob Ghumti,


Sapne Bhi Bas Tere Aayein,
Itni Mere Dil Ko Bhaye.


Kadam kadam pe hawa ki aahat ka dhyan rakhna,
Mushkil samay mein bhi iss dost ko yaad rakhna,

Hamari yaadon ki khushboo zaroor aayegi,
Tum bus apni naak saaf rakhna.


Baagon mein phool khilte rahenge,
raat mein deepak jalte rahenge,


khuda aapko saari khushiyan de,
baaki takleef to hum dete hi rahenge.


रहिमन कूलर राखिये… बिन कूलर सब सून।
कूलर बिना ना किसी को… गर्मी में मिले सुकून।।

एसी जो देखन मैं गया… 
एसी ना मिलया कोय।
जब घर लौटा आपणे…गर्मी में ऐसी-तैसी होय।।

बिजली का बिल देखकर… 
दिया कबीरा रोय।
कूलर एसी के फेर में… खाता बचा ना कोय।।

बाट ना देखिए एसी की… चला लीजिए फैन।
चार दिनों की बात है… फिर आगे सब चैन।।

पंखा झेलत रात गई… आई ना लेकिन लाईट।
मच्छर गाते रहे कान में… तक तना तंदूरी नाईट।।

गर्मी में बुझी-बुझी सूरत… जली-जली स्किन।
कन्या कोई न देखे मुड़के… आ गए ऐसे दिन।।


शहर का लडका गाव की लडकी पटाता है:
लडका: तुमको whatsapp चलाना आता है?

लडकी: नहीं,
पर तुम चलाना में पीछे बैठ जाउंगी


Chaand Per Kaali Ghata Chhati To Hogi,
Sitaaron Ko Muskurahat Aati To Hogi,


Tum Lakh Chhupao Dunia Se,
Magar Akele Me Tumhe Apni Sakal Per Hassi Aati To Hogi.


School Ke Paas Hamesha Drive Slow Ka,
Board Hamesha Laga Rahta Hai,

Lekin Ladkiyon Ke College Ke Paas,
Kabhi Bhi Nahi,
Aisa Kyu ?

Kyuni Wahan Par Toh,
Ghadiya Apne Aap Slow Ho Jati Hai.


Tu kahe to chaand taare tod du,
Tu kahe to bandh darwaze khol du,

Tu kahe to yeh duniya chhod du,
Tu ek baar haske to dekh mere dost,

Tere saare gande daanton ko tod du.


Main Tere Aane Ka Intezar Karunga
Tu Jaha Jayegi Main Tere Saath Rahunga
Tu Jab Mujhe Yaad Karegi Mai Tere Paas Aaunga
Ye Dosti Mai Marte Dum Tak Nibhata Rahunga
Aur Na Nibha Saka To Main
Tere Hath Kisi Aur Ke Hath Me Dekar Jaunga.


Chhod diye wo kam jinke galat the anjam,
Ab kuchh din nek kamo me bitayenge,

Aur 12thpass karne ke baad hi,
Koi nayi ladki patayenge.


Dil ke arman aansuo mein bah gaye,
Hum gali me the gali mein hi reh gaye,
Light chali gayi thi to…
...
Jo baat unse kehni thi wo unsi mummy se keh gaye


Haseen Tum Ho To Bure Hum Bhi Nahi,
Mehlon Mein Tum Ho To Sadkon Par Hum Bhi Nahi,
Pyar Karke Kehte Ho Ke Shadi-Shuda Hain Hum,
To Kaan Khol Ke Sun Lo Kunware Hum Bhi Nahi.


Baharo ful barsao mera dost aaya hai,
hotho pe muskan gali me mahak laya hai,
barso tak thi jise pani se allergy.

wo aaj lux se nahaya hai!


वो बेवफा होती तो यारों बात और थी
उसकी वफ़ा से ही दिल में जखम है।

हर दुसरे दिन उसका मैसेज आ जाता है
“मोबाइल रिचार्ज करा दो बैलेंस ख़तम है”


Bahut Khoobsurat Ho Tum
Khud Ko Duniya Ki Buri Nazar Se Bachaya Karo
Sirf Aankhon Mein Kajal Hi Kafi Nahi
Gale Mein Nimbu-Mirch Aur Chappal Bhi Latkaya Karo


Pyaar Ke Geet Gayenge Hum,
Apni Ek Nayi Duniya Basayenge Hum,
Jo In Hawaaon Se Diya Bujh Gaya,
Unhe Bech Kar Philips Ke Bulb Layenge Hum.


Hum Dil Phenk Aashiq Har Kaam Mein Kamaal Kar De,
Jo Wada Kare Woh Pura Har Haal Mein Kar De,

Kya Zarurat Hai Ladkiyo Ko Lipstick Lagane Ki,
Hum Chum-Chum Ke Hi Honth Laal Kar De.


हम दिलफेक आशिक़ हर काम में कमाल कर दे,
जो वादा करे वो पूरा हर हाल में कर दे,

क्या जरुरत है लड़कियों को लिपस्टिक लगाने की,
हम चूम-चूम के ही होंठ लाल कर दें।


Dhup Me Chamakti Profile Hai,
Sabse Alag Tera Style Hai,
Kya Ada Hai Kya Smile Hai,
Naak Pochne Ki Akal Nahi,
Aur Hath Me Mobile Hai.


Humare dil ne chaha tb-tb aap jaage the,
Humare dil ne chaha tb-tb aap jaage the,
Kyu ki wo hum hi the ..
Jo apke ghar ki ghanti baja ke Bhaage the.


Kashmir ki wadiyon mein,
Barfeeli hawaon mein,

Jheel ke kinare Heer ko Ranjhe ne jo kaha,
Wohi baat main tumse kehta hoon,
...
SWEATER PEHNO THAND LAG JAYEGI !


Zubaida,
Karishma,
Kareena,
Natima

Chalo Aaj Sabko Dikha Dun Cinema
Meri Umar Kya Hai Ye Kyun Poochte Ho
Kahin Ishq Ka Josh Hota Hai Dheema.


Aaj Ek Sweater Aur Pehen Lo,
Aaj Ek Razai Aur Odh Lo,

Aaj Ek Muffler Aur Lapet Lo,
Aaj 2 Moze Aur Pehen Lo,

Aaj Ek Kehwa Aur Pii Lo,
Aaj Ek Heater Aur Chala Lo,

Kya Pta. Kal Thand Ho Na Ho!


Ek khawab ek khayal ek hakikat hai tu,
zindgi mein pane wali har zarurat hai tu,
jisko roz msg karne ko dil kare

are yaar vahi sweet si musibat hai tu.


Umar kya kahu kaafi nadan hai meri,
Has ke milna pehchan hai meri,
Apka Dil zakhmo se bhara ho to mujhe phone kiziye,
DILO ko Repair karne ki dukaan hai meri.


Kehdo un padne walon se,
Kabhi hum bhi padha karte the,
Jitna syllabus padh k wo top kerte hain,
Utna to hum choice per chod dia kerte the.


Phone ke rishte bhi ajeeb hote hai,
Balance rakhkar bhi log garib hote hai,
Khud to msg karte nahi hai,
Muft ke msg padhne ke kitne shauqin hote hai.


India ki reet
Ladki agar apni marzi se pat jaye to pyar,
agar dost pata de to uphar,
agar gharwale le aaye to sanskar,
aur agar khud pata kar ghar leaao to hahakar.


Koi gham nahi magar dil udas hai,
Tujh se koi rishta nahi phir bhi ehsaas hai,
Kehne ko bohut apnay magar tu ek khas hai,
Zyada emotional na hona upar sab bakwas hai.


8-9 Mahine tumhe avoid kiya mujhe,
Lekin ab tum mujhe or dur nahi rakh sakte,
Aaj nahi to kal apni baahon me mujhe jarur loge,

With love
Tumhari purani
”SWEATER”


Itna khubsurat kaise muskura lete ho,
Itna qatil kaise sharma lete ho,

Kitni aasani se jaan le lete ho,
Kisi ne sikhaya hai..
ya bachpan se hi kamine ho?
 


Arz Kiya Hai….

Normal friend thi wo meri,
Achanak se mere liye khaas ho gayi.

Zindagi bhar fail hoti thi,
BOSSDKi pregnancy test me pass ho gayi…


Har nazar ko ek nazar ki talash hai,
Har chehre mein kuchh to ehsah hai,

Aapse dosti hum yun hi nahi kar baithe,
Kya karen hamari pasand hi kuchh KHAAS hai.


Ajeeb Si Kashish Hai Tum Mein,
Ki Hum Tumhare Khayalon Mein Khoye Rahte Hain,

Yeh Sochkar Ke Tum Khayalon Mein Aaoge,
Hum Din Raat Soye Rahte Hain.


Aap Ko Miss Karna Roz Ki Baat Hai,
Yaad Karna Aadat Ki Baat Hai,
Aap Se Dur Rehna Kayamat Ki Baat Hai,
Magar Aap Ko Jhelna Himmat Ki Baat Hai.


Pyar aur maut se darta kaun hai,
Pyar to ho jata hai ise karta kaun hai,

Hum to kar de pyar me jaan bhi qurban,
Par pata to chale hmse pyar karta kaun hai!


Chiragon mein agar noor na hota,
To tanha dil itna majboor na hota,

Kasam se hum aapse milne zarur aate,
Agar aapka aashiyana itni door na hota.


Pehli Nazar Mein Laga Wo Meri Hai,
Aankhein Uski Jheel Si Gehri Hain,


Purpose Kar-Kar Ke Thak Gaya,
Tab Jaake Jana Ke Saali Behri Hai.



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Best Funny Shayari in Hindi - फनी शायरी - हिंदी शायरी

March 06, 2022

Best Funny Shayari in Hindi


Best Funny Shayari in Hindi- फनी शायरी - हिंदी शायरी

हमारी बारी जब आयी तो हमसे डॉक्टर बोला
चलो जल्दी दिखाओ,
और भी बीमार बैठे हैं
जो पहले आये थे लेते हैं कब्रिस्तान में जाकर
बचे हैं यहाँ जो दो चार,
तैयार बैठे हैं.

Humari Baari Jab Aayi To Humse Doctor Bola
Chalo Jaldi Dikhao,
Aur Bhi Bimar Baithe Hain
Jo Pehle Aaye The Lete Hain Kabristan Mein Jaakar
Bache Hain Yahan Jo Do Char,
Taiyaar Baithe Hain.


Maine Pani Me Ek Ka Sikka Dala
Aur God Se Ek Pyara Sa Dost Manga
Mujhe Aap Mil Gaye
Aur Upar Se Awaz Ayi
Ek Rupee Me Itna Hi Milta Hai


Kamar jitni bhi patli ho maza utna nasheela hai,
Chalega jo bhi ho aankhon ka rang kala ya neela hai,
Ishq k naam pe kerte sabhi ab RASLEELA hai,
Main karu to saala character dheela hai.


Phone Mat Kiya Karo Dear,

Mom Hoti Hai Near,
Papa Se Lagta Hai Fearbaat Bhi Hoti Nahi Clear,
Isliye Sms Karo Dear,
Without Fear & Very Clear.


Har Safalta Par aapka Naam Ho,
Aapke Har Decision Par Kamyabi Ka Mukam Ho,

Thand Aa Gayi Hai Dhyan Rakhna,
Main nahi Chahta aap ko sardi aur jukam Ho.


Kapde Silvane Ho To Dhund Lo Darji..
Wah Wah..
Ershad-Ershad..

Ki Kapde Silvane Ho To Dhund Lo Darji..
aur Nangu pangu Ghumna Ho To,
Aapki Marji!


Arz kiya hai…
LIC wale bhi kya gazab dhate hain,
LIC wale bhi kya gazab dhate hain,
Logon ki biwiyon ke paas ghanton baith k ..
Husband ke marne ke fayde batate hain.


Tum Sa Koi Dusra Jamin Par Hua,
Toh Rab Se Shikayat Hogi,
Ki,
Ek Toh Jhela Nahi Jata,
Doosra Kahi Mil Gaya To Kaya Halat Hogi.


Dil mein khuda hai,
Aankhon mein nasha hai,
Bato mein maza hai,
Chahat mein ada hai,
Andaz bhi juda hai,
Dosti mein wafa hai,
Arey yaar..
Isiliye to sari duniya HUM par fida hai.


Ye Duniya Hai Yahan Pe,
Yeh Tamasha Ho Bhi Sakta Hai,

Abhi Jo Gham Hamara Hai,
Tumhara Ho Bhi Sakta Hai,

Tum Apne Aap Ko Hargiz,
Koi Ilzaam Mat Dena,

Ye Soda Hai Mohabbat Ka,
Khasara Ho Bhi Sakta Hai

Tum Yeh Mat Samajhna,
Tum Hi Meri Akhri Mohabbat Ho,

Mohabbat Jurm Hai,
Hum Se Dobara Ho Bhi Sakta Hai.


Aaj kal tum muskurate bahut ho,
Mere dil ko bhati bahut ho,

Dil kehta hai le jaaun tumhen dinner pe,
Par suna hai tum khaati bahut ho!


Kar Gyi Ghar Mera Khali
Mere So Jaane Ke Baad
Mujhko Dhadka Tha Ke Kuch Hoga Tere Aane Ke Baad
Maine Dono Baar Thane Mein Likhayi Thi Report
Ek Tere Aane Se Pehle,
Ek Tere Jaane Ke Baad.


Aaj mausam mein ajeeb si baat hai,
Bekabu se hamare khayalat hain,

Jee chahta hai chura loon aap ko aapse,
Par mummy kehti hai chori karna paap hai.


Bazuon Me Dum Rakhta Hu,
Dil Me Gham Rakhta Hu,
Pata Tha SMS Ayega Tera,
Isliye Painkiller Sang Rakhta Hu.


Aaj kal tum mushkurati bahut ho,
Mere dil ko bhaati bahut ho,

Dil kehta hai le jaaun tumhen dinner pe,
Par suna hai tum khaati bahut ho!


Aapke Har Gunah Ki Mafi Hai
Aap Jo Roye To Bahut Na Insaafi Hai
Aapki Aankho Mein Na Aaye Kabhi Pani
Kyunki
Behne Ke Liye To Aapki Naak Hi Kafi Hai.


बेझिझक मुस्कुराये जो भी गम है,
जिंदगी में टेंशन किसको कम है,

अच्छा या बुरा तो केवल भ्रम है,
जिंदगी का नाम ही कभी ख़ुशी कभी गम है।


2 Baar Lips Pe,
2 Baar Gaal Pe,

1 Martaba Mathay Pe,
2 Baar Eyes Pe,

Cold Cream Zaroor Lagana,
Sardi Aa Rahi Hai Na.
Happy Winter Season


Har taraf padhai ka saya hai,
Kitabo main sukh kisne paya hai,

Ladke to jate hai tution ladkiyan dekhne,
Aur sir kehte hai dekho itni barsat mai ladka padhne aya hai.


Larki Ro Ro K Larkay Se
Keh Rahi Hai,

Larki Ro Ro K Larke Se
Keh Rahi Hai,

Haath Chooro Jan..

Meri Naak Beh Rahi Hai.
Happy Winter Season
Aaaa….chhii


Kisi ko apna banalo,
ya kisi k ho jao,
agar kuch bhi nahi hota to

DON’T WORRY
chadar-takiya lo aur so jao.


Jab dekha unhone tirchi nazar se,
Kasam khuda ki madhosh ho gaye hum,

Par jab pata chala nazar permanent tirchi hai,
To wahi khade-khade behosh ho gaye hum.


Marne pe hum dono ko jannat mile,
Yeh hava yeh bahar mile,

SMS karne mein kanjusi mat kar mere dost,
Pata nahi jannat mein signal mile ya na mile.


Dil ki dhadkan ruk c gayi hain,
Saanse meri tham c gai hain,
Pucha humne dil k doctor se to pata chala

Es dil me aapki yaaden..
Sardi ki wajah se jam c gai.

दिल की धड़कन रुक सी गई,
सांसें मेरी थम सी गई,
पूछा हमने दिल के डॉक्टर से तो पता चला,
कि सर्दी के कारण आपकी यादें दिल में जम सी गई।


Tumhari yaad dil se jaane nahi denge,
Tumhare jaisa dost khone bhi nahi denge,

Roz sharafat se sms kiya karo warna,
Ek kaan k neeche denge or rone bhi nahi denge.


Har doori mitani padhti hai,
har baat btani padhti hai,
lagta hai dosto ke pass waqt hi nahi hai,
aaj kal khud apni yaad dilane padhti hai.


Dil sapno se ‘HOUSEFULL’ hai..
Pura hona bhi ‘DOUTFULL’ hai..

Is Duniya me har Chiz ‘WONDERFUL’ hai.
Kyuki life tum jaise dosto se ‘COLOURFUL’ hai.. 


Dhadkan dil ki ruk jati hai,
Sanse aksar tham jati hai,
Bahut buri halat hoti hai yaaro,
Jab Girlfriend se shadi karne ki naubat aati hai..!


Zindagi Behaal Hai,
Sur Hai Na Taal Hai,

Message Box Bhi Kangal Hai,
Kya Aapki Sms Factory Mein Hadtal Hai,

Yaar Kuchh Toh Bhejo,
Yeh Mere Mobile Ki Zindagi Ka Sawal Hai.


Jab Jab Ghire Badal Teri Yaad Aayi,
Jab Jhoom Ke Barsa Sawan Teri Yaad Aayi,
Jab-Jab Main Bhiga Teri Yaad Aayi,
Ab Raha Nahi Jata,
Chattri Lauta De Bhai.


Majnu Ko Laila Ka SMS Nahi Aaya,
Majnu Ne Do Din Se Khana Nahi Khaya,
Majnu Marne Vala Tha Laila K Pyaar Me,
Laila Baithee Thee Sms Free Hojane Ke Intezar Me.


Meri prem kahani ka kya ajeeb ending tha,
Meri prem kahani ka kya ajeeb ending tha,
Maine propose kia SMS se,
Kambakth woh uski shaadi tak pending tha.


Hum Aaj Bhi Dil Ka Aashiyana Sajane Se Darte Hai,
Baagon Mein Phool Khilane Se Darte Hai,
Hamari Ek Pasand Se Tut Jayenge Hazaaro Dil,
Tabhi Toh Hum Aaj Bhi Girl friend Banane Se Darte Hai.


Umar ki raah mein JAZBAAT badal jate hai,
Waqt ki AAndhi me HALAT badal jaate hai,

Sochta hoon kaam kar kar ke Record tod dun,
Lekin kambhakt salary dekhte he KHAYAAL badal jaate hai..

उम्र की राह में जज्बात बदल जाते है।
वक़्त की आंधी में हालात बदल जाते है
सोचता हूं काम कर-कर के रिकॉर्ड तोड़ दूं।
कमबख्त सैलेरी देख के ख्यालात बदल जाते हैं


Nazar mili jab wo akeli thi,
Dosti hui tab sath saheli thi,
Pyar hua to vo pehli thi,
Dusre ke sath bhag gai tab pata chala..
Wo us area ki CHIKNI CHAMELI thi.


Kabhi hausla bhi aazmana chahiye,
Bure waqt mein bhi muskurana chahiye,
Chahe kitni bhi thand pade hafte mein,
Ek baar to nahana chahiye.


Nakhre aap ke toba-toba,
gajab aap ka style hai,

message to aap kabhi karte nahi,
bas halla macha rakha hai ki..
hamare pass bhi mobile hai!

नखरे आपके तौबा-तौबा
गजब आपका स्टाईल है,
मेसेज तो आप कभी करते नहीं,
बस हल्ला मचा रखा है की..
हमारे पास भी मोबाईल है।


Mohalle Mein Nayi Masuk Aayi Hai,
Lekar Nakhre Purane,
Lajawab Husn Hai Log Mar Kar Hi Rahenge,
Moti Hai,
Kaali Hai,
Thigani Hai,
To Hone De,
Use Lekar Konsa Tu Ghumne Ja Raha Hai Europ.


Tum door sahi majboor sahi,
Par yaad tumhari aati hai,

Jab saans wahan par leti ho,
To badboo yahaan tak aati hai.


Muqaddar Mein Raat Ko Neend Nahi To Kya,
Muqaddar Mein Raat Ko Neend Nahi To Kya,
Hum Bhi Muqaddar Ko Chuna Lagate Hain,
Aur Din Mein Hi So Jaate Hain.


Tujhe pane ke liye kuch bhi kar sakta hu,
Tere pyar mein jee aur mar sakta hu,

Phir bhi tu nahi mili to koi gham nahi,
Yeh formula dusri pe bhi try kar sakta hu.


Mohabbat Karli Tumse Bahut Sochne Ke Baad,
Ab Kisi Ko Dekhna Nahi Tumhe Dekhne Ke Baad,

Duniya Chhod Denge Tumhe Pane Ke Baad,
Khuda Maaf Kare Itna Jhooth Bolne Ke Baad!


Popcorn ki khushbu,
Mungfali ki bahaar,

Thandi ka mausam aa gaya hai yaar,

Thodi si masti,
Thoda sa pyar,

Muffler sweater rakho dhokar taiyar.
Happy Winter season


Dil ka dard dil todne wala kya jaane,
Pyar ke rivazon ko ye zamaana kya jaane,

Kitni takleef hoti hai ladki patane mein,
Yeh ghar baithe ladki ka baap kya jaane.


Dooriyon ki na parwah kiya karo,
Jab dil chahe yaad kiya karo,
Dushman nahi hain dost hain hum aapke.

Mera sms na aaye to khud bhej diya karo!


Jis Chehre Ko Dekh Kar Haste The Hum,
Aaj Usine ‘Rula Diya’ Khud Ne To Phone Kiya Nahi,

Humne Kiya To Caller Tune… 

‘Tujhe Bhula Diya’


Safar Lamba Hai Dost Banate Rahiye,
Dil Mile Na Mile,
Haath Badalate Rahiye,
Taj Mahal Na Banaiye Mehnga Padega,
Magar Har Taraf Mumtaj Banate Rahiye


Ram Ne Sita Ko SMS Kiya,

Dear Situ,What’s up?
Main Yaha Mast Hu and Hope Tu Bhi Good Hogi,
Laxman Tujhe Miss Karta Hai…Yaar Tu Tension Na Le,


Main Bahut Jaldi Tujhe Ravan Ke Yaha Se Le Jaunga.

Maine BSNL Ka Sim Liya Hai,

Aur Ravan Ka Number Free Karwa Liya Hai,
Ravan Ko Maine Mobile Per Bahut Gaaliya Di,


Saale Ne Ye Bol Ke Phone Kaat Diya Ki Battery Low Hai,
Main Tujhe Micromax Ka 30 Days Battery Backup,

Dual Sim Wala,
Aur 8GB Ka Card Sad Song Bhar Ke Mr. 


Hanuman Ke Hath Bhej Raha Hun.
Isme Net Surfing Bhi Hai…
Ab Hum Tum Night Mein Calling Ke Maje Le Payenge,

India Mein 3G Bhi Launch Ho Chuka Hai,

Ho Sake To Lanka Se Video Calling Ka Try Karna…

Laxman Top-up Card Lene Gaya Hai,
Aur Haan Maine Vibhishan Ko Facebook Pe Add Kar Liya Hai. 


Lanka Mein Kya Ho Raha Hai,
Wo Sab Status Update Kar Deta Hai,
Chal Baad Mein Chat Karenge,
Bye!
Love You… Ram


Jalte hue deepo ki tarah jagmagate rahna,
hamari dua hai sada muskrate rahna,
kitni bhi chappalen pade tumhe e mere bhai,
zindgi bhar aap ladkiya patate rahna.


Aap Ki Chaal Mor Jaise,
Aawaz Koyal Jaise,

Dimag Lomdi Jaise,
Aankhen Hiran Jaise,

Par Kitna Achcha Hota,
Agar 2-3 Quality Insano Jaise Hoti.


Arz kiya hai..
Muskarana to har ladki ki adaa hai,
Wah wah..
Gor farmaiye..
Muskarana to har ladki ki adaa hai,
Use jo mohabbat samjhe wo sabse bada GADHA hai.


Arz kiya hai:
Aankhon mein nami thi,
Aur vitamin ki kami thi..

Wah!
Wah!

Jis se raat bhar chatting ki woh

girl friend ki mummy thi.


Arj Kiya Hai:
Samma,
Parwane Se Kuchh Kah Rahi Hai,

Samma,
Parwane Se Kuchh Kah Rahi Hai,

Darling Jara Rumaal Dena,
Meri Naak Bahut Bah Rahi Hai.


Teri Saanso Ko Meri Dil Mein Panah Mil Jaye,
Wah Wah
Teri Saanson Ko Meri Dil Mein Panah Mil Jaye,
Agar Tu Na Mile To Ye Dil,
Kisi Aur Ke Ishq Mein Fanah Ho Jaye.


Jisey Dil Diyaa Voh Delhi Chali Gayee,
Jisey Pyaar Kiyaa Voh Italy Chali Gayee,
Dil Ne Kaha Khud Kushi Karle Zalim,
Bijli Ko Haath Lagaaya To Bijli Chali Gayee.


Mohabbat karli tumse bahut sochne ke baad,
Ab kisiko dekna nhi tmhe dekhne ke baad,
Dunia chod denge tumhe pane ke baad,
Khuda maaf kare itna jhoot bolne Ke baad.


Humne unki tasveer apne man mandir mein saja li,
Unki yaadein aapne dil mein basa li,

Lekin jab unhone hame koi tawazzo na di,
To humne bhi nki chhoti behen phasa li.


Kya Mausam Aaya Hai,
Har Taraf Pani Hi Pani Laya Hai,
Ek Jadu Sa Chhaya Hai,
Tum Ghar Se Bahar Mat Niklna,
Warna Log Kahenge Barsat Hui Nahi,
Aur Mendak Nikal Aaya Hai.


Ajib hai nakhre tere,
Ajib hai tera style.

Naak pochne ki tameez nahin 

aur haath mein hai mobile!

Cham Cham kar ke aayi,
Cham Cham kar ke chali gayi,

Main Sindoor leke khada raha,
Aur woh rakhi ban ke chali gayi.


Tumhari Salgirah Pe Jaana Kia Bhejoon,
Apni Jaan Bhejoon Keh Apna Dil Bhejoon,

Phir Sochta Hoon Jaana Kion Na,
Tumhare Liye Kee Hui Shopping Ka Bill Bhejoon


Chala Ja Message Tu Banke Gulab
Hogi Sachi Dosti To Ayega Jawab
Na Aaya Jawab To Mat Hona Udas
Samjh Lena Bartan Saaf Kar Rahein Hain Janab


कमजोर दिल वाले ईसे ना पढें…. खतरनाक शायरी

खिडकी से देखा तो रस्ते पे कोई नही था
खिडकी से देखा तो रस्ते पे कोई नही था
वाह वाह
फिर रस्ते पे जाके देखा तो खिडकी मै कोई नही था |


Wo aaj bhi is garmi mein marr rahi hai,
e-dostoJo maine use ek baar keh diya tha…
Tum is sweater mein katrina kaif lag rahi ho.


Dhoka mila jab bhi pyar mein,
Zindgi mein udasi chha gayi,

Socha tha chhor denge is raah ko,
Kambakht phir ek new number se miss call aa gayi.


Muqaddar mein rat ki…
neend nahi to kya hua,
Hum bhi muqaddar ko dhoka de kar…

din ko so jatay hain.
...
 Oh my God


Use karte hain makeup ka dabba roz kyun,
Ban sanwar kar nikalte hain roz kyun,
Mummy,
tum to kehti thi Eid to kab ki gayi,
Phir padosan se gale milte hain papa roz kyun.


Dhoka Mila Jab Pyar Mein
Zindagi Mein Udasi Chha Gayi
Socha Tha Chhod Denge In Raaho Ko
Per Aaj Mohalle Mein Dusri Aa Gayi


मोहब्बत के खर्चो की बड़ी लंबी कहानी है,
कभी फिल्म दिखानी है तो कभी शोपिंग करानी है,

मास्टर रोज कहता है कहाँ है फीस के पैसे?
उसे समझाऊं मैं कैसे की मुझे छोरी पटानी है!


Winter Ka Zamana Hai,
Msg Karke Aap Ko Satana Hai,

Mausam Bhi Diwana Hai,
2-4 Msg Aap Bhi Kar Do,

Kya..
Balance Bacha K
Naya Sweter Lana Hai.


Krishna ke kadmon pe kadam badhate chalo,
Ab murli nahi to siti hi bajate chalo,

Radha to ghar wale dilayenge hi magar,
Tab tak gopiyon ko hi patate chalo.


प्यार एक झटके में हो जाता है पर उसे..
पूरा करने के लिए बहुत सारे झटके लगाने पड़ते हैं।

अपने दिल में रहने दो ना मुझे,
कसम से बाहर बहुत गर्मी है..




कितना ही जानलेवा फिगर क्यों न हो तेरा..
पर सुन पगली,
ईतना मत ईतरा हमारी तारीफ के बीना सब अधूरा है।




इस गर्मी की वजह से हालात ऐसे हो गये हैं कि ..
आजकल तजुरबा लिखा हुआ भी 

पड़ने में तरबूजा ही आता है।



प्यार की गहराई का पता तब चलता है,

जब बिस्तर पर लड़की पूछ ले..
पूरा चला गया क्या?




दुनिया के सारे झूठ एक तरफ,
ऊपर-ऊपर से करूँगा वाला झूठ एक तरफ।




एयरफोर्स में जाना था,
दोस्तों..

पर जिंदगी रास्ते बदल कर,
मैनफोर्स में घुस गई।




वो दोस्त उम्र भर क्या साथ देंगे जिन्होने..
चौराहे पर पुलिस देखकर बाइक से उतार दिया।




खून में तेरे मिट्टी,
मिट्टी में तेरा खून..

ऊपर सूरज,
नीचे डामर,
बीच में मई और जून।




मटर पनीर समझ कर दोस्त बनाए थे ..
साले सब के सब टिंडे निकले..!


Sharab Sareer Ko Khatam Krti Hai
Sharab Samaj Ko Khatam Krti Hai,

Aao Aaj Is Sharab Ko Khatam Karte Hain,

Ek Bottle Tum Khtam Kro,
Ek Botal Hum Khatam Karte Hai..


Na yeh CHAND hoga na TAARE rahenge,
Kya hum hamesha KUNWARAY rahenge,

Is duniya me kitno ke NIKAH ho gaye,
Kya naseeb mai apne sirf NIKAH ke CHWARE rahenge.


न चांद होगा ना तारे होंगे,
क्या हम इस साल भी कुंवारे होंगे ,

इस दुनिया में कितनों के निकाह हो गए ,
क्या हमारे नसीब में सिर्फ निकाह के छुहारे होंगे।


Ansoon tere nikle aur aankhein meri ho,
Dil tera dhadke aur dhadkane meri ho,

Khuda kare hamari dosti itni gehri ho,
Ki naukri tum karo aur salary meri ho.


“Thand aur insult”
Jitni Mehsoos Karoge Utna Jyada Lagegi*
So..

Be Careless
&
Be Beshram
Enjoy Life,
Enjoy Winter!

Think Hatke,
Jiyo Datke!


Hansti Thi Hansaati Thi,
Dil Ko Bahut Badi Thi,

Dekh Dekh Shaam Aati Thi,
Phir Andar Se Muskurati Thi,

Aaj Pata Chala Ke Woh,
Khud Toh Pagal Thi,

Mujhe Bhi Pagal Banati Thi,


Mooli Gajar Ka Noor Aap Per Barse,
Aapki Chahat Ko Aalu Tamatar Bhi Tarse,
Aapki Zindagi Mein Aaye Itne Baigan Ke,
Aap Kuch Bhi Aur Khane Ko Tarse.


Jawani ke din chamkile ho gaye,
Husan ke tevar nukeele ho gaye,

Hum izhar karne me thode dhele ho gaye,
Aur udhar unke hath peele ho gaye.


Arz Hai:
 Na Muskurane Ko Jee Chahta Hai
Na Kuch Khane-Peene,
Na Sone Ko Jee Chahta Hai

Ye Garmi Ab Barsaat Nahi Hoti
Sab Chhod Kar Ab
Shimla Chale Jane Ko Jee Chahta Hai


Teri khamoshi aur udasi ki wajah 
hum samajh na sake ae dost,
....
Wo to shaam ko teri mummy ne bataya

ke aaj teri chappal se pitai hui hai!


Aapki smile ne saara jahan hila diya,
Aapki smile ne saara jahan hila diya,
Koma say jage mareez ko permanent sula diya..


मेरी कब्र के पास Wi-Fi जरूर लगाना,
क्योंकि मेरे दोस्त..

इतने कमीने है कि Wi-Fi यूज करने के लिए,
जरूर मेरे पास आएगे।


तेरी कमर पर हाथ रक्खा था..
नियत का फिसल कर नीचे सरकना तो लाज़मी था।


आयेंगे तेरी गलि में चाहे देर क्यू न हो जाये,
करेंगे मोहब्बत तुझसे हि चाहे जेल क्यू न हो जाये।


तु Hike‬ की रानी मे ‪Facebook‬ का राजा..
मिलना है तो ‪Whatsapp‬ पे आजा।




गिरा दे जितना पानी है तेरे पास ऐ बादल,
ये प्यास किसी की लेने से बुझेगी तेरे बरसने से नहीं।


अगर इश्क़ करो तो अदब-ऐ-वफ़ा भी सीखो,
यु दोस्त के रूम पर ले जाकर ठोकना मोहब्बत नही होती।


कोई माल में खुश है कोई सिर्फ दाल में खुश है
खुशनसीब है वो लोग..
जो हर हाल में खुश है।


ईंट पर ईंट चढ़ता है तो दीवार बन जाता है,
और..
लड़की पर लड़का चढ़ता है तो परिवार बन जाता है।


हमारी तो किस्मत ही कुछ ऐसी निकली,
जमींन मिली तो बंजर Admin मिला तो कंजर।


Tumhari lovely aankho ne,
Hame aise attract kiya,
Ke sabko neglect karke,
Tumhe hi select kiya.



Yaar Ne Dil Ka Haal Bataana Chhor Diya,
Humne Bhi Gehrayi Me Jana Chhor Diya,
Aap Ne SMS Karna Kya Band Kar Diya,
Humne Mobile Charge Karna Chhor Diya.


Unki gali se mera janaza nikla,
Wo na nikle jinke liye janaza nikla,

Unka ghar aaya to mere dost siti bajane lage,
Rakh ke mera janaza kamine usko patane lage.


Charo aur padhai ka saya hai,
Saare paper mein zero aaya hai,

Hum to yun hi chal dete hao 

bina muh dhoye exam dene,

Aur log kehte hain,
Sala raat bhar padh ke aaya hai.


Tumhari naam ki ghazalein
Chand par likhne ko ji chahta hai.
Par kya karu yeh zalim
Khwab amavas ki raat ko hi aata hai.


Na jaane kab koi taara toot jaaye,
Na jaane kab koi aansu aankh se chut jaaye,
Kuch pal hamare saath bhi has lo,
Na jaane kab tumhare daant toot jaaye..!


Ek Boond Se Sagar Nahi Banta
Rone Se Muqaddar Nahi Banta
Patana Hai To Pura Girls Hostel Patao
Ek Ladki Patake Koi Sikandar Nahi Banta


2 Baar Lips Pe,
2 Baar Gaal Pe,

1 Martaba Mathay Pe,
2 Baar Eyes Pe,

Cold Cream Zaroor Lagana,
Sardi Aa rahi Hai Na.
Happy Winter Season


Dekha tujhe to rooh khush ho gayi,
Ek kami thi woh bhi puri ho gayi,

Pagal hain woh log jo kehte hain ki,
Chimpanzee ki aakhri nasal kahin kho gayi!


Tajmahal ko dekh kar bola shahjahan ka pota,
Tajmahal ko dekh kar bola shahjahan ka pota,
Aaj hamara bhi bank balance hota,
Agar DADA Aashiq na hota!


Bhaiyo aur Only Bhaiyo,

Neend Nahi Aati Mujhe Tab Se,
Neend Nahi Aati Mujhe Tab Se,
....
5 Rupye Khoye hai Jab Se.


Zindgi Ki Har Ek Udaan Baaki Hai
Har Mod Par Ek Imtihan Baki Hai
Abhi To Sirf Aap Hi Pareshan Hai Mujhse
Abhi To Pura Hindustan Baaki Hai.


Har safar mein aapka saath hum denge,
Apne pyar ki saugat hum denge,
Girne lage to hath hum denge,
aur Na bhi gire to..
EK LAAT HUM DENGE


Kyun kisi ki yaadon mein roya jaye,
Kyun kisi ke khayalo mein khoya jaye,

Mera to yakeen hai,
Bahar mausam bahut kharab hai,
Kyun na razai tankar soya jaye.


Kisi k pass yo yo honey singh ka number hai kya!
Wo kehta rehta tha,
Pass kara du,
phone ghuma du..
...
Exams sar pe hai No. jaruri hain yaar.


Bank Ke Lootere Bank Mein Ek Sher Farmate Hain
Taqdeer Mein Jo Hai Vahi Milega
Wah Wah
Taqdeer Mein Jo Hai Wahi Milega
Hands Up Koi Apni Jagah Se Nahi Hilega


Zindgi mein sada muskurate raho,
fasle kam karo dil milate raho,
dard kaisa bhi ho koi gham na karo,
iodex kharido aur lagate raho.


Ishq hai to ishq ka izhar bhi hone chahiye,
Aadmi ko shakl se bimar bhi hona chahiye,
Yaadon ko keh do,
do chaar din ki chhuti de de,
Akhir ishq mein itvaar bhi hona chahiye.


8-9 Mahine tumhe avoide kiya mujhe,
Lekin ab tum mujhe or dur nahi rakh sakte,
Aaj nahi to kal apni baahon me mujhe jarur loge,

With love
Tumhari purani
”SWEATER”



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